Now gather 'round, children...cuz mama has LOTS to fill you in on.
Yesterday was Thanksgiving Day at the Lucas household...and boy, what a day it was!
First off...my day was MADE when Elvira showed herself up in the kitchen of Fern's house. I was like "I'm sorry. Come again? ELVIRA? Does she even KNOW them?!" I swear to God, her appearances are so random and awesome, she's starting to remind me of Bubba in the Sookie Stackhouse series. All the sudden...there she is! And you know it's going to be a good time.COMMA HOWEVER - a good time was NOT had by all on turkey day at Brock's mom's. Oh no it wasn't. And why not? Because LAWDY (as Vi would say)...there was a whole boatload of shiz that went down...in one day! Where do I begin??? OK - let's break this down so slower people like me can understand it better.
Levi - Assuming it's "Lee-Vigh" but I keep hearing it as "Leh-vee". LOL Anyway - WHAT a dildo. Seriously. This guy could bring down a bunch of 4 year olds on Christmas Eve at the North Pole. Talk about a buzz kill. Um Lenore? Yeah. Honey. I don't give a shit HOW hot he is...DUMP his dumb ass before it dumps yours. And we all know it's about to in about 30 seconds. What a loser that he has to bring his young, hot pieces of ass to THANKSGIVING so everyone will know how cool he is; NOT. I know guys like this and lemme tell ya...I DON'T like them. At all.
Vi - What else needs to be said? Girlfriend shows up and shoves her hands in the potatoes. That's loyalty if you ask me.
Jill, Laura, The Hubs: Whatev. Nice people. I could hang with them. I'm happy for Tess that Brock's sisters and their hubs are so cool. That is the SAME relationship I have with my sister and bros in law who married my husband's brothers and sisters (there are 6 of em - 3 boys, 3 girls. You got it; the Brady Bunch. He's Peter). Solidarity in numbers...and non blood relations. When shit goes down we all huddle together and silently utter our collecte "Mmmm hmmmm"s.
Fern - LAWDY I was happy when she finally spoke up and took charge over the family dissent over Cob. I don't know that I'd have had the dignity to invite him to stay...but someone needed to step up and she did it gracefully.
Cob - SHIT! I HATE that I LIKE him. Damnit!
(LOL Sorry. Bruce tangent. It happens.)
More Olivia - She wants him back? Are you SHITTING ME?!? OMG I was fighting falling asleep latenight in bed with my book and you'd better believe THAT little tasty morsel woke my ass up and got my brain functioning again. I am LIVID and I can't WAIT to see what's going to come of THAT little trampy declaration.
Tess - OMG I would have FREAKED THE HELL OUT when Olivia was outside with her head on Brock's chest. Holy shit! I wouldn't have done it publicly; I would have been reserved like her ("Oh it's fine...it's fine." Women always swallow so much shit, don't we??) But inside I'd have been FREAKING. And I can't see myself going to watch a movie and falling asleep. I'd have stared at the TV in a panic, pretending to watch but over thinking everything that had gone down. I'd have wanted to get the hell out of there SO fast. When Brock drove her home and came in with her, I was a bit sceeved and thinking "Ugh - just go HOME and give me some space!"
Brock - I liked his explanation of why he looked "conflicted"...which would have had me looking VERY conflicted. Holy hell. But seriously - he's always so calm, cool and collected. Can anyone be that much of a good guy all the time? I don't know. And I've got half the book to go...so I'm TERRIFIED of what he's going to do. Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. I fear (know) there HAS to be some kind of upheaval and Tess is going to get hurt...even if they do end up working things out and getting back together after the inevitable-but-temporary impending break up.
ISN'T IT ALL JUST SO DELICIOUS?!?
These books are like having a tremendous cake in front of you - and a fork - and you find yourself slicing off large chunks of frosting WITH that fork...just because you can. And just when you think it can't get any tastier, someone walks in and brings you a kick ass grande, decaf, mocha latte to wash it all down.
Not that I drink those or anything.
I think you said last night that you were still reading about Thanksgiving and I thought, "What? Carol obviously hasn't gotten to the good stuff yet! She's going to explode!" That was delicious reading right there, yeah?
ReplyDeleteLOVED your rants about Levi and Bruce! ROTFLMAO, You called Levi a dildo! *giggle.*
Totally agree with Brock needing to give her space but I'm really glad that he didn't. She would have worked herself into an unhealthy, emotional frenzy, like we do. Points for Brock for shutting that down fast.
Off to watch the Bruce video with the headless woman!
OK I commented but I have no idea what happened to it. This fired me all up. Levi was being a douche but I just can't hate him. Don't know why. I did however, want to throw up in my mouth when he told Tess that Olivia wanted him back. No you do not, you just don't want anyone else playing with your discarded toys. I HATE Olivia. I would have been silently freaking too. She's a BEOTCH.
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